Personally, it was more important to me that he asked. When he asked I knew he wanted to be with me for the rest of our lives, and that's what I was excited about. I knew where I stood. The actual marriage part is just gravy -- of course if he pulled out at the last minute then I'd reevaluate that statement.
I just feel like the wedding is a formality, albeit a formality I wanted to happen, that forces everybody to recognize that yes, we're in a real relationship and if one of us dies, we get the other person's stuff. Also, hi, I happen to value this person and I am announcing it to everybody and the government.
There's this pretty darn good life we've built together, and this ceremony will just sew it up into a nice little package that other people can understand. Because you tell someone you have a boyfriend and they assume different things than if you tell them you have a husband. I'm sort of tired of that assumption.
I'm also excited to spend time with family and friends and celebrate, and know that even the friends and family that can't be there in person, will be with us in spirit. But the ceremony part? Where I have to be looked at and will probably cry? Let's just say, it's something I have to do, and I will be happy when it is over.
I'll leave you with one of my favorite poems, "A Dedication to My Wife" by T.S. Eliot:
To whom I owe the leaping delight
That quickens my senses in our wakingtime
And the rhythm that governs the repose of our sleepingtime,
The breathing in unison
Of lovers whose bodies smell of each other
Who think the same thoughts without need of speech
And babble the same speech without need of meaning.
No peevish winter wind shall chill
No sullen tropic sun shall wither
The roses in the rose-garden which is ours and ours only
But this dedication is for others to read:
These are private words addressed to you in public.
No comments:
Post a Comment