whispers

Most days lately I can tune out the whispers, the bubbling up of tempting snippets that make me turn my head and say, what, say that again, i didn't quite catch... the words that make their home in cracks between Goals and Future and Planning, the serendipitous and perverse.

But there are days when I inadvertently let my guard down, when I wonder, what if, for just a blink. Since I've had LASIK, there are occasional moments when everything I see is crisper, more colorful, more real, than I ever remember it being. I stop what I'm doing and I just look around, because I know the switch will turn off in a second. The whispers are like that. They are the anti-rut and they demand what they demand.

Why aren't you writing? they say. Why aren't you traveling? Why aren't you taking pictures? This is what you call life? Do you have anything to show for it? These whispers battle with other whispers, about money and responsibility and time. To the point where I throw up my hands and say, Why do you always have to be so damn serious... it's just a big joke anyway. Figure out the punchline and move on.

In other news, I finally completed our taxes. Let's give it up for TurboTax.