Empowering the Prone

At first I thought I escaped December's worst. Mid-month my weight stayed the same, and then I stopped working out and it began to creep up. All told, I fell into January 2 pounds heavier. Two pounds doesn't sound like much, but it sets me back a month. Bummer.

So. Armed with my high contrast castle calendar and a bagful of stickers, I've been chipping away at my slothful gluttony. I started tracking Weight Watcher points again -- even when I go over. And that whole gym thing -- been back for a week. Corporate Christy prepaid my membership for a year, so no excuse. Thanks, CC. For nothing.

I kid, CC.

I should mention, what with spending all this time alone with the cats, I talk to myself. Sometimes I even talk back.

Then there's daytime TV when I can stand it. Lately I've seen a lot of "I've fallen and I can't get up" ads. And I have a revolutionary idea for you. Wait for it... Okay.

Why don't people who are prone to falling over and not being able to get up keep at least one phone on the floor? Then they can crawl or wriggle over to it and empower themselves to call for help. If a phone doesn't make sense, what about a megaphone? Or, I don't know, a whistle?

Or, like our neighbors, set off some barking dog noises at 6am every morning. That'd get my attention, I guarantee you.