You should know that these slippers are on their way to me, and will soon be on my feet as I type. I am hopeful that the cats won't eat the tentacles off his face, but I make no promises.

I'm on day two of diligently recording everything I eat and I have one thing to say: it is exhausting to think about food all the time. I've never given this much thought to fruit for example, really never. I used to make fun of people like this, and here I am pricing fancy vegetable steamers that I wouldn't really need if I could only figure out how to use a colander properly. But they remind me too much of a Strawberry Shortcake flower shower I had when I was little, and I get confused whenever I see one. The petals are everywhere! is what my brain is broadcasting. Now no one can shower inside a giant strawberry.

I tried to convince Jer that I NEEDED to buy the Alton Brown "Good Eats" DVDs so Mr. Alton could teach me how to cook proper-like but he wasn't having any of it. Apparently I have a history of spending excessive money on things I NEED only to find out later that it just plugged some mental hole and once the hole was filled I didn't need it anymore. (I'm looking at you, Body By Jake Ab Rocker.) So, sorry Mr. Alton. I will be watching you on cable with the other paupers. And maybe someday I'll figure out how to steam a stick of broccoli, or whatever you call it.