Back to School

Today I am not a fan of people who brag that they are early-adopters. This is because early-adopted products don’t usually work like you expect them to, and then when someone hands it to you all excited and says, oh the old way? The old way is inefficient, we use this spiffy, sparkly, new way now. Well, then you’re screwed because the new way’s best feature is making you want to rip your eyelashes out and paste them into pretty pictures of unicorns. It’s only fun to play with new technology when there isn’t a deadline of yesterday.

I’m taking a community college class in usability or software something-or-other that starts Feb. 1. Stay tuned for wacky back-to-junior-college stories. I worked it out and if I cared I could totally get a (insert awed whisper here) Certificate. Yes, I know what you’re saying. You’re saying, Christy? Don’t you already have two bachelors, and one-third another? And I will say, shut up. I don’t have a (awed whisper) Certificate. I wonder if it’s got a fancy gold foil stamp on it and the signature of an impressive personality. There’s only one way to tell. Come hell or high water (hello twenty-something consecutive days of rain), I’ve got to get me one of them (head bowed, eyes glistening) Certificates.

Know how I know I’m an optimist? Today I didn’t bring an umbrella.

The condo association opted not to discuss the cable/internet problems in favor of condo board political turmoil, an event which I am tempted to capitalize. Instead, the cable providers are considering replacing a strategic node which may yet serve as our very own deus-ex-machina in an otherwise completely uninteresting tale of sound, fury, and blue plastic booties.