Torn

I just cracked open a cool, refreshing Diet Dr. Pepper. Only, it tasted a little funny. So (obviously) I kept on drinking it. And then I thought to look on the bottom of this freshly cracked carbonated beverage for the expiration date. What did I see, gentle reader?

That's right! Dec 29, 2003 - Ten points to Gryffindor!

My soda is seven in dog years.

Now I'm conflicted. I'm thirsty, but at the same time, disgusted. This day just got a whole lot more complicated.