It is what it is

Sunday night. Last night before I start my new job. I am having some trouble figuring out what to do next, so maybe writing this out will help me focus. I'm trying not to worry about things I have no control over, which has the end result of paralyzing me into inaction.

I feel very grateful for all of the things I have and the people in my life. Jeremy and I have been blessed with many opportunities and gifts. And we have these things because we worked for them and took advantage of chance when it presented itself, not to mention the fact that we've been very very lucky. But right now I wish he didn't have to work so much on account I won't see him again until Friday evening. It's always hardest the first day of the week when I realize how long it'll be.

So it's been a productive week off and I'm excited about beginning a new chapter in my life. I'm thrilled at the chance to learn new concepts and take on new challenges. But tonight I'm feeling just the tiniest bit sorry for myself, because Jer has worked 30 hours of over-time in the past two weeks and we really haven't seen each other, and now we won't see each other at all for 5 days.

The big picture is still there. We are working hard now in the hopes we won't have to work so hard later. And in the grand scheme of things my little issue is nothing. We will see each other again eventually and our schedules won't always resemble a Venn diagram. Outside I hear a siren go by and I know someone else is having a much worse day than I am. The most tangible thing I can complain about is that my feet are cold.

Okay. Time to shut down this computer and be present. And maybe put my Cthulu slippers back on.